Friday, October 16, 2015

Helmet Head & No Tears Shed

We went yesterday to pick up Max's kinderBAND helmet. All sorts of emotions ran through me. I was excited for this process to finally begin. I was sad that my sweet baby boy has to wear a helmet on his head for three months and I was scared Max was going to be miserable with his head covered by this huge piece of plastic.

I have to admit all in all the experience was a good one. Max seemed to have no problem at all with the helmet as you can see and although a couple of times I felt a tear forming, I managed not to shed a tear.

By Monday my sweet boy will be wearing his camouflage head device for twenty three hours a day. The helmet only comes off for cleaning. The thought of this is still frightening. My boy has so much hair and it is going to be covered up almost all the time. I love running my hand through his hair and rubbing his forehead. I am not going to be able to do that for three entire months. And those kisses I always give him on his forehead, they are going to have to be postponed for three months too. I feel the tears coming again but I am holding back.

The fact is Max's head is flat and not just a little flat. It is off the charts flat. This is the right decision. There is no way I am going to look back at this experience and think I wish I did not do it. If I did not do it and this boy was teased in middle school for having a funny shaped head, I would totally regret not getting the helmet. I am doing the right thing but it is still hard.

People are going to stare and question what is going on. They are going to assume something bigger and worse is going on with my son. They may even think I am a crazy mom that does not want my kid to get hurt. I am going to be judged and my son is going to be judged. That is hard for me. Taking Max to the park is going to be an entirely different experience next time we go. Going out to eat, to the mall, or just a stroller walk around he neighborhood is going to be different.

I have heard some really great stories from other moms with helmet heads. I hope to have a great story to share as well. This could open up a conversation with someone I may have never met. This could bring women and friends into my life that otherwise would not have been. I just hope for questions instead of stares. I hope for sweet smiles instead of cruel judgement.

This is just the beginning of Max's kinderBAND journey. To be continued ...

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